Accept: There is no right choice

This post is part of a series exploring the question “How can you stop the fear of making the wrong choice?”.

For many of us the reason choices are hard is because we don't want to make the wrong one. I certainly know that’s been true for me. The fear of making the wrong choice can come from many places. Maybe you were rewarded for being the “good kid” growing up and you feel pressure to do the “right thing”. Or maybe you worry that you need to get this one decision right because it is really important and will shape the rest of your life. Or perhaps the unknown is paralyzing.

Here’s the thing: There often isn't one right choice.

The right choice is very personal. The right choice for me may not be the right choice for you. And the right choice for you two years ago might not be the right choice for you now.

Even more so, often times the hardest choices are the ones that feel like they have multiple good options, or all bad options. Sometimes, there just is no wrong choice and therefore no right choice either. This is an idea that was hard for me to accept. The amazing Hannah Curtis not only introduced this idea to me, but also encouraged me test and accept it.

The decision probably is not as permanent as it seems.

Even some really big, daunting decisions that feel really final, such as accepting a job, moving to a new place, or committing to a new relationship, actually are not final. Realizing this can help even these big decisions feel more doable.

Learn from your decision and continue

The lovely and inspiring Kate Swoboda introduced me to the phrase “It’s all an experiment.” when I trained through the Courageous Living Coach Certification last year. When you take the attitude of, “it’s all an experiment”, you are choosing to see your decisions as experiences to learn from. No matter the outcome, you’ll gain more information about yourself and what you truly want. After making decisions, it is important to take a little time to reflect and notice how the decision made you feel and what you can learn from the decision.

Can you accept that there may not be a right choice?

Accepting that there is no one right choice doesn’t make the decision for you, but it can take some of the pressure off. It can give you some room to think more clearly, something we all need more of when making a decision.

This is why we must spend time getting to know ourselves and getting really clear about what we want in our lives. More on that soon.